There has been much ado on the internet about what it takes to be real man. Some say you have to open doors for a girl and pull up her chair when it's time to eat. Some say you have to strong-arm her into you because bad boys make good girls wet. Little do women know that as thoughtless as guys seem to be, we, too, are picky when it comes to the women we date. Well, speaking for us who can get laid.
There is no objective truth when talking about men's tastes in women. The broad genres the porn industry created over the years is proof of that; cinema, too. Korean men fancy their women wild but with a human side (see My Sassy Girl, My Girlfriend Is A Gumiho, Windstruck.) Japanese men like their women cultured and armed with refined tastes even in this modern time (watch Gokusen or any Jdorama and notice how women suddenly go from man-like to courtly in the presence of the man they want to date.) We Filipinos? We like our women vulnerable, hard-to-get, and generally stale. Watch any primetime teleserye and you'd be blind not to notice how women never take the lead, how they're constantly soaked in melodrama, and how they're the type the mean girls just can't get enough of.
So with all this in light, how do you become the right girl? The answers are simpler than you think.
1. You must love life. Have you ever heard guys in romance-dramas say "My life has changed since I met her."? Lines like these aren't totally bull after all. When you love life, you automatically bring positivity and good feelings to the man you're sharing your life with. Each time you go out with him, it'll be like he has escaped his problems for a moment and all his attention is focused on you. This is the greatest advice anyone can give you.
"Dave, how do I do this?" The love of life comes from the love of self. You must start living a healthy, balanced lifestyle: Exercise, go out with your friends, do your best at work or in your studies, and lead an honest life. Even if you're not physically dazzling, your love of life will make you beautiful from the inside. Here's a rhetorical question that's become cliche because there's so much truth in it: How can anybody love you, if you don't love yourself?
2. Be knowledgeable in at least one guy thing. Though women have made great strides over the years, and though it hurts a bit to hear it, it's still a man's world. Okay, settle down. Even if you disagree, it wouldn't hurt knowing a thing or two about a man's hobby. Be it whittling, hunting, Christopher Nolan, Silent Hill, or automobiles, it impresses a man to see how a woman has an inside track on his world. Want proof?
Megan Fox handles Bumblebee surprisingly well in the first Transformers. This scene alone makes the movie hotter than your average PG-13. Shia Labeouf agrees.
"Dave, how do I do this?" You may not know it yet, but you're already knowledgeable in at least one guy thing! What was the last action movie you watched? Go talk about it the next time you see him. What was the last rock or rap record you listened to? Bring it up next time. If you're comfy bringing up sex or martial arts, don't show off to much. It's embarrassing when we stammer you know.
3. Do not play games. Ever. There is a fine line between falling in love with your partner and falling in love with your insecurities. Playing games (or in Tagalog, "Nagpapa-miss ako." or "Pinagseselos ko lang siya.") is just a desperate cry for attention. Men may not have the same emotional quotient as most women do, but that's the fault in your stars: If a man notices you playing him and he's smart enough to swing back, there will be blood. Yours. Playa'.
"Dave, how do I do this?" It's better to re-evaluate things from the inside than having to resort to high school tactics. If you're already in a relationship, ask yourself if it's still on the right track. If you're single, then cool; you can still hang-out with other guys you enjoy spending time with. It's best to not take yourself too seriously, too. If you think you're somebody and you deserve his time while doing absolutely nothing, then you need to get in touch with reality. Do not make bad boys out of good men just because you feel left out.
4. Be ye confident. A lot of women think that we guys are supposed to come and fix their issues like it's what we do for a living. News flash: We are not your repairmen. You are supposed to stand strong on your own feet (hopefully with the help of friends and yourself.) Who run the world? Yeah. Welcome to the 21st century. If you don't go after what you want in the world of love, you're going to end up with weak-willed men. This advice could come across as harsh but the truth sometimes is bitter. Do you think Mila Kunis, Rihanna, and Kate Upton earned the praise of men by being insecure in their skin; acting twee-tums? Didn't think so.
"Dave, how do I do this?" Cleanse your thoughts from all negativity. From now on, no more self-loathing. Do you talk to yourself a lot throughout the day? Good. Count all the negative thoughts that cross your mind with your fingers. Whenever you raise a finger, force yourself to see the bright-side to that negative thought. Say, you drive up to a club with your girlfriends on a Saturday night. It's a full house and there's nowhere to park. What do you say to yourself? "Ugh. Crap. I've been looking forward to this night all week! Now I have to move to another club!" Raise a finger, pause for a moment, and think: "There's gonna be a lot of people there, so the roof will be on fire! Right on!" You don't have to join the rest of your friends in clamoring. Park on the curb and enjoy the night.
5. Do not be stale in bed. This is more like tip 4.5. Moving in the bedroom without inhibitions is the ultimate form of confidence and self-expression. Do not let your man do all the work. Even if a guy gets to bed a Miss Universe and all she did was wait for him to move, he'll feel like playing Monopoly alone. This is also a warning: Women often cheat because they don't feel emotionally fulfilled, men on the other hand, often cheat when their physical needs aren't met. What's worse than lying next to a statuette who moans and does nothing in return? It's like being unappreciated when you're most vulnerable.
"Dave, how do I do this?" If you're not ready, you're not ready. Stop thinking about it. Don't be afraid to say 'wait' or 'no' when asked to do the deed; it's supposed to come naturally. However, when you're ready to go anchors' away, here are a few simple tips to make it more exciting. Wear something seductive. Something lacy and almost see-through but not bear-all. When you're suited up, relax and let nature take its course. Give head, hand, foot, tongue--whatever you have in your arsenal. Listen to him and cater to what he wants, and if he's a decent lay, he'll cater to yours as well. Whole books are written on how to do it; there are literally a million ways. The more you do it, the better you get. (Wink).
That's it for now.
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